Friday, December 17, 2010
FML FML FML. So sick and tired of everything. Everything seem so fked up that i don even noe whats wrong. I mean, lyk, usually, im nt worried or stress up with things pple usually will. For eg. studies-exams, no, im nt worried. love, don even need to mention, cux i don realli bother abt it. Money, nt an issue either. Family? friends? dota? no. no. no. What else? Everything seems to be alright but im feeling so fked up. Fking contradicting. Perhaps im tired or pms or whatever, i jux feel lyk slping and nt waking up. I don haf the mood to do anything, no nt even playing. Damn nerd. I wanna whine soo much, but yet again, i don feel lyk doing it. Whatever. FML.
Just ME ;
Thursday, December 2, 2010
In life, we do encounter lots of obstacles, factors tt stop us from continuing to work towards our goal, stuffs tt bring us down, things that demoralizes us, people tt make our life miserable and of cux, nt forgetting, the happy moments which makes our life worth living for. Life has lots of ups and downs. It is unpredictable. What mux happen, will eventually happen. Whenever something happen, it may nt necessarily happen for a reason. But I can say, there’s definitely a positive and negative point of view. It jux depends on HW U LOOK AT IT.
Shit do happen. Esp when u didnt expect it to. Well, we cant do much abt it can we? I do believe that ders such a thing called fate. But im nt talking abt the fate which brings pple tgt and stuffs liddat in fact, the fate which im talking abt nw is --> fate meaning the things that are planned for us. Definition: Fate is an event or a course of events that will inevitably happen in the future or the supposed force or power that predetermines events. Of course, i do believe that we can make changes. Like for eg, if u're born to be poor, u may nt necessarily be poor forever. Things tt 'fate' have in placed for us will eventually happen, but its the choices we make tt changes our life and destiny.
Anyway, back to the purpose of this post. Something happened which makes me go W-T-F-U-K, F-M-L. U noe, lyk the kind of feeling whereby u wish the law changes to like for murdering someone is jux a $1 fine so tt u can jux do it, like right nw. (jux kidding) For those of u who noe, yea. For those who dont, its okie, its nt smth great to be spread ard either. After reading my blog, i bet i'll haf a few conver asking me abt wat happened. Sometimes, the reason why i don tell is becux basically 1.im too lazy to repeat all over again. 2. Don see a need to. 3.I don find ur advice helpful. 4.im getting over it, so i don wanna mention. Im not criticizing or whatever, but still, I'd like to thx those who care in advance. Realli. Appreciated. =D
Like what i've mentioned earlier on, there are 2 ways for me to look at it. --> Negative & Positive.
Negative --> I'll whine. I'll complain. I'll be sad. I'll even think of hw sad my life is, shd i end it or wat. Like FML FML FML. *whines* I can hide at one corner and cry. Feel so afraid and perhaps do nth but emo again. I can blame, blame my parents, blame anyone, or even blame myself for what i also dunno. Or perhaps, i'll think of murdering tt person. (Obviously im jux thinking, like duh. im nt so dumb to ruin my life)
Positive --> Guess wat, im attractive. woot. Im worth wasting time for (For some strangers who i don even haf an idea they exist, and some weirdo). Im worth it. And guess wat, this actually made me boost up my own confident. Confident = winning 50% of the battle. Having confident = mre attractive. Heard before? (okie no link) I can get almost anything i wan, be it pple or things- anything. Hw does tt sound? =O Im talented. I may nt be fking smart, but well, at least, im smart enuff to handle situations like this. Last but nt least, at least i noe i gt pple to care for me, pple who will support and help me if i need. =D
See the difference.? Its always beta to look on the bright side. For eg, you'd of cux, rather an optimistic friend than a one who is pessimistic rite. Take for instance, u jux came out from a exam room and the test is kinda difficult. U're worried tt u'll fail. Friend A. --> says, GG the test sure fail, die sure jialat, hw fail liao FAIL FAIL FAIL. Fail tgt. *whines* Friend B. --> says, Why worry? Why think so much.? U did ur best, u wont fail. PASS FTW. we shall pass tgt! *cheers* Which is beta?
Being optimistic not only influences the mood of others, it also increases ur lvl of confidence. If i were to look at negative side all the time, hey, guess wat, my life will be fking miserable. With soo many shitty stuffs i've encountered before, i can guarantee i'll be an emo freak tt has potential risk of committing sucide and whines all day.
With tt, i've whine/complain/said all i wan. It happened ytd, but today, well right nw, yes, im sooo happy. I gt wat i wanted. I managed to get things to turn out the way i wanted, the ideal outcome. Like what i've said, i may nt be so god damn smart, but yea, at least i handled it properly and im proud of myself. I love myself =D Things arent tt bad all the time, it depends on hw we see it. Another purpose of this post is also to encourage one of my friend to cheer up and think positively. (I noe smth happened which made u kinda sad). If u're reading my blog (i noe u'll be), heyy smile. U noe who u are =D
Sooo, to end off, lets all look on the bright side shall we. =D This suddenly reminds me of a song tt goes "always look on the briiighhhttt side of life~~~~" <--- Damn random. HAHAH.
Just ME ;
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Nobody likes to lose. Some may say that they don mind, but tts for the minority. Of cux, I love to win. I hate to lose. I hate to lose, much more than I love to win.
Losing, to me, basically means that u're weak, u're nt up to the standard, u're noob and u're a l-o-s-e-r. People look down on the losers, look up to the winners. Thats life. (When i say this, i don specifically mean gaming onli, i mean in general).
For example. In sports or activities. People will only rmb the winners. Idolize them. Reward them. Recognize them. Inspire to be like them. Have you ever seen anyone hoping to be someone that loses? Sad to say, but no.
Just like dota, whenever theres a conflict or smth, u'll hear pple saying things like "Nt happy lai pk la", "don talk so much, u get ur 5" or "come 1v1"? Den after the match, usually, the winning team will BM the losing team. Den of course, the 'losers' will LL and keep quiet. Well, they cant do much can they? Imagine losing and someone still go ahead saying "win means pro meh? u noob stfu". <-- Throwing his face, ps ttm. It jux onli show hw 'nerd' he is. If losing to a team who is so-called noob, den it makes tt person even worst? O.O sometimes, pple nvr use their brain when they talk, and they become a JOKE.
In most cases, losing = no pride. Would you rather pple to see u as someone who is 'wow, pro' or 'eh? tt loser?'.? Like in compy, when i see someone owning, i'll think 'wah zai', den again, when i see someone tio own i;ll think 'wtfuk? joke?' Seriously, its not abt being mean or whatever but in most cases, its liddat. Take for instance, if u dunno this person and if you see him owning, well, there are 2 possibilities. 1. He is a pro. 2. opponent noob. Honestly, no one will be thinking, wtfuk. he own he noob ar? <-- if someone thinks tt way, den tt person is a joke.
Pool, dota, sing or whatever i do, i'll aim to be the best (among my friends, nt those world champion like duh?) Im not saying that im soo damn pro, but at least, i can say, im nt a noob. <-- sounds confident Hehe =D. If i try something and i noe its so nt 'me' (meaning i wont be able to train until the above average standard and can onli stay as a noob), i'll give it up. For example, counter strike. I used to play this game hmmm, prob few years back, cant realli rmb. But anyway, I find myself damn noob =x I tried playing for awhile to see if i can improve on it or whatever, but fail. HAHAH. So i gave up playing cs. The reason why i fail is basically cux, i cant aim. zzz. Whenever i see the enemy coming towards me, i'll be like, wtfuk, gg --> boom, die. Usually pple will be able to aim, shoot, run. But i dunno why i cant. GG. =< So ya, i was saying, i rather gif it up, than to be a joke.
This reminds me abt smth. In gaming, majority of them are guys. Actually i dunno why. Whenever i asked my friends, they will say tt they are nt interested, or its too 'boyish', too difficult to learn or too complicated. Some say its kinda boring and shopping is much beta. Gals shd doll up, find ways to get prettier and so they shd shop shop shop. Hmmm, true to a certain extend? I wont go on saying out my views and stuffs cux im lazy to blog soo long (prob some other time when i gt nth to blog) =x
So ya, i was saying, when guys noe that the person is a gal, usually they will haf either one of these perception. 1. Wow, cool. 2. wtfuk, sure weak. 3. gal nia so?
2. wtfuk, sure weak. <-- i hate such guys. I've encountered quite a few situations liddat, and yes, its damn annoying. If gals = weak, den ur mother also weak ok. If ur mother is weak, she wouldnt be able to gif birth to u. So, seriously, guys, don think tt way. Im nt trying to promote tt gals are fking zai or whatever, but still, having such a thinking is damn nerd.
Anyway, the main purpose of this post is not to look down on losers or whatever. Those are jux my opinions (well at least what i think for myself). Whenever i lose badly, i'll think tt way. But this does nt necessarily apply to the people i noe. In life/match/game/compy or whatever u call it, there will always be a winner, and losers. Its okie to lose, but nt all the time. Learn from mistakes, pick up valuable lessons from losing, put in effort to improve, work hard and be a winner. =D
Just ME ;
Thursday, November 25, 2010
My attachment is about to end in 1 day + 1 week time. 11 weeks of SIP, so fast, its gonna end. To be honest, it doesnt realli matter to me. During my SIP, i was given quite a few task, so yes, its kinda slack. My supervisor is nt those kind who will keep controlling, keep looking at you, make sure u do ur wrk and stuffs liddat. (He is a busy man). As such, i'll tend to take longer lunch. (lets hope tt he doesnt noe, or at least, don mark me down badly when evaluating) HEHE. I feel kinda guilty but its okie, cux even if im back early, i'll be stonning. My working place is quite comfy <--(supervisor table ok )If i don haf to wake up early (prob start wrk at 12), the company enable fb, youtube and stuffs and i can end a little bit earlier( 4 liddat), hey, i wouldnt mind having 'nvr-ending' SIP. HAHAH. Okie. i shall stop dreaming. zzz
Anyway, I printed out my timetable. Yes. My school/lesson timetable. Instead of feeling 'enthu' and excited to go back to school, I tot of which lesson to skip. WTFUK. HAHAH. Gosh. I feel damn bad. Why will i think of such things. My sis and even my bro started studying and go for all lectures and stuffs but i keep thinking which one can i skip. I rmb when i saw my bro and sis studying, i said this " Wow, so guai. When i start school, i'll join u guys". Den my sis shoot me she said " Yaya, i hear u say alot of tyms liao". <--- Jitao don gif face one. =< Habit, mindset, lazyness, character or watever. GG. Hopeless. But ehhh, i say hopeless doesnt mean im dumb and stupid ttm until gt no hope okie. Hopeless in a sense tt, i shd gif up trying to be a gd student who attends lecture, do daily revision and tutorials. But overall, my grades are still gd okie. (at least all pass hor). Sooo, nvm. Lets wait for school to start den i'll see my mood and do things accordingly. =D (Mayb one day i suddenly gt the mood to study den i study whole day. Well, whoo knows?)Heheh.
Random random. I was surfing the net (for info to do my report) and i dunno why, i suddenly click and entered this page which has tis realli cute guy. LEE MIN HO. YES. He is the korean guy who acted in one of the Korean drama (Boys over flowers). Den there is another guy Kim Hyun Joong, also a Korean, who acted in the same show too. (If u guys dunno who izzit, go Google it). I wanna add in another guy. NO. He is nt a Korean. And YES, i guess most of u would haf guessed it. He is LEE HOM WOOOOOOOOOOTT. Seriously, in this world, gt pple soo perfect de meh? Gosh. Don ask me name out why i find him so gd cux seriously, it will be nvr ending <-- k la, abit kua zhang. But Still, Perfect~. Repeat after me, P-e-r-f-e-c-t~ Perfect~. Looks, talent, body. Jux this 3 things. OWN UNTIL HOLYSHIT ALREADY OK. 6 Divine also cant win. HAHAH. (I DAMN BO LIAO I ADMIT). My bf. hehe. k la. i don bhb already. I wanted to continue to post about my ideal bf (realistic one), but im kinda lazy to think and elaborate so perhaps another day.
In my opinion. Note: i already said MY OPINION k. Don ltr u read liao come msn shoot me say, wtfuk whr gt such things, u nonsense blablabla. I feel that Korean/Taiwan guys haf the best looks. [Celebrities] (Korean guys look damn cute and hot, Taiwan guys gt this 'pai kia' and cool look) Japanese guys are mesmerizing. Perhaps its their culture or wat (most da nan ren), they tend to haf this 'man' aura/personality/appearance/impression. Ang moh veri gentleman. (for eg, quite a few times when getting off the bus, the ang moh will offer to let the gal walk first). China guys veri noisy. Blangla guys gt this 'tiko' look. I don mean to criticize ok, but tts wat i feel. (i kana stalked by blanglas before). And of cause not forgetting sg guys --> depends. hahah. Actually nt much comment. =x Normal ba. Some realli gd, some realli kns.
Soo, with this, i shall stop here. (I suddenly damn lazy to blog, feel lyk stonning)
O.O
Just ME ;
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
I wanna whine.!
Okie, firstly, i saw this news on stomp. "China woman crushing rabbits and cats to death". I bet most of you guys saw that too. In case u didnt, heres the link. http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/stomp/sgseen/caught_in_the_act/498066/women_laugh_as_they_crush_bunnies_to_death_why_are.html Then again, i saw another stomp post which says, they were paid to do it. Wtfuk? Seriously lor. Those rabbits so cute and innocent, why on earth would anyone pay someone to do such a retarded act.? I didnt watch the video. K. I admit. Im afraid to watch it cux i think it will be damn gross and saddening. Realli leii. Fk those china woman and people involved in it lor. I hope they die. No. Wait. Not jux die. Before they die, they kana raped by 10 blanglas who havent bath for 100days and ltr the body kana chop into 1000 pieces to feed dogs. Zzz.
Next. Today, i was on my way to work. I already woke up late, soo i was rushing and stuffs liddat. Not a realli gd morning to start off. Den nvm. I was walking to the bus stop at bedok inter to take bus. Den hor. Gt this fat lady wearing heels walking in front of me. She walk damn slow. Den nvm lei. Using HP sms-ing. Still, nvm lei. (cux sometimes i also sms and walk and the same time) But at least, she could haf jux walk to one side or smth and not in the middle rite? Soo, i tried to walk in front of her cux seriously la, she walk damn slow. i think my grandmother walk also faster. I walk left, she move slightly to the left, den i wanna go right, she move also. Realli. I NVR LIE. Den yes, i rage and purposely say, HAIYA, den jux walk and bang dao her hand or smth. Don say me rude k. But realli lor, she think the place her father or grandfather one izzit. Worst still, pple wan walk she don gif way. like hi? joke.
Den another thing. Why some pple so damn bo liao one? Like nt gentleman or whatever. This was wat happened ytd. I was playing draft game at Cwr 2. We had this super retarded opponent. HAHAH. Read on, u'll know why i HAHAH. K. I was lagging. So, i paused the game. Den i typed to all saying " wo hen lag. can tunnel.?" Then gt this opponent said smth lyk " can don anyhow pause anot. can inform or wat first zzz" Den i say, "i damn lag, by the time i inform my hero auto move in front liao". Den this retarded shit tell me. " THAN?" PCB. Fking fail serious. Its not than, it shd be "then?" Then the host and his friend start to guai lan, lyk say u lag my prob or? (of course, my friends also helped me scold them back). K fine. FINE. So the game resumed. Den blablabla. We played on. Abt 15mins or smth, the game kinda changed to 1 sided. OF COURSE, we were winning =D. MY TEAM DE RK HOLYSHIT LEI. The rest support damn zai, farm also damn gd. Like hi.? Wan guai lan also wait until win den gl rite. So YES, AS EXPECTED, WE ALL GANG UP TO GUAI LAN DEM BACK. esp the guy who 'THAN?' me one. His nick is Art^style or smth. ( Next time u see him in cwr 2 and lf last don gif him k) muahahahah. super evil. Den the rest i forget. Starting i already don lyk tt guy. Cux my friend told me mayb he is the Axis Thisisart or smth, but nt sure. And if u guys noe, Yes. HE fking bm me before, and well, i did it too. =D Soooo, We all kinda gang up and shoot them all the way. DAMN FUN I SWEAR. ESP WHEN U SHOOT UNTIL THEY LL. THEY DIAM DIAM. THEY NTH TO SAY. WOOOOOOTTT. Then one of them said, can ff. GG. so in the end, i win? NO. IS WON. HEHE. song bo. kk. i shall stop zi high-ing. NOTE: nvr offend a gal k. =D
Im not trying to say tt im a gal, so they mux gif in to me or whatever. But still, even if im a guy, lyk hi? the most basic courtesy will be at least to wait awhile, tunnel or some shit den ask me try to see if lag anot rite? Lyk fking ungentleman. I think they noe im gal, so like wat? GALS EASY TO BULLY IZZIT? fk ni mama lor. JOKE. Luckily, i gt friends to support me and help me. Woot. <3 =DDDDD soo, yes, i gt the last laugh. Okie la, i noe its kinda childish or whatever, but if pple don bm me, i wont bm them. I peaceful one ok. Like since when u see me typing on chat flaming or scolding random pple for nth? No rite? yes, i can say NO. cux im nt tt bo liao. neither am i a bmer. Most of the time, those pple jux find trouble for nth. Lots of tym already. But anyway, who caresss. Most of the time, i win. woot.
Since my mood is gd, after thinking of tt, i shall blog some happy stuffs. =D Today, when i go to wrk, (actually not today onli, its most of the tym), when i enter, those wrkers or drivers will lyk HI, GD MORNING den smile at me. Of course, i'll smile back. Im friendly ok. Den today this supervisor and 3 wrkers standing tgt wave at me and hiii. HAHAH. so cute. seriously, damn funny. What a nice and warm welcome to the office. =D Next, this aunty, she made coffee for me. O.O Den, I gt this breakfast which my mother put in the effort to wake up early in the morning to toast for me so i can bring to wrk. Aww. so nice can. Cux she noe, im lazy. I'd rather slp than eat. And she scare tt i'll be hungry so she toasted bread or smth for me to bring to wrk. =D. Slp > Play > Eat. I can play whole day and not eat, and i can slp whole day and not play and eat. HEHE. (some reading this confirm say i pig). Nahh, u guys pig also.!
Im so contented with my life nw. With the Care, concern and support received. Yes. I wanna remain liddat man. There are little things and obstacles that will knock us down in life, but hey, if it happens, jux get back up, think of the happy stuffs, cux soon, it'll be beta. So pple, lets stay happy shall we? =D
Just ME ;
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Okie. let me start off with some random stuffs --> Im feeling damn cold! Its raining heavily outside plus aircon inside the office and im wearing a thin shirt. DAMN COLD AH. And also damn tired. If i haf my bolster nw, i swear i'd fall aslp. Ytd night i dreamt that pudge( a dota hero) chasing me and trying to hook me and rot me to death. Jux when the pudge was abt to come close to me or smth, my mother woke me up. HEHE. So slpy uh. When i sleep really well, I get more slpy. When i think of stuffs and cant get to slp that well, i wont feel so slpy. Weird huh?
Okie thats not the main purpose of blogging. Today, I wanna blog abt 2 things. My goal and future. o.o sounds chim rite. or shd i say, sounds wrong. WHAT? ME TALKING ABT FUTURE? When i don even plan shit. HAHAH.
Okie. firstly --> Goal. Previously, i don have a goal. yeah. not even once. Perhaps the best will be hoping to pass or smth, but no, i don consider that as a goal. Now my goal, win dota compy.! (at least 3rd) i noe its kinda difficult cux der are lotsss of PROs out der, but yes, if a goal is easy to get, it wont be challenging. The dota compy which i joined, i lost. =< Seriously, we could haf won it. But tt day, i damn stress and dunno doing wat shit, so kept making mistakes. Damn burden. HAHAH. If i can play the way i play at home (focus, concentrate), those mistakes can be avoided. Emo uh. But its okie. I'll try again. I used to say to my friends, If u think u can, u can. Hopefully uh. ( Actually i say to motivate them, but its easy to say, yet hard to do it. =x)
Quite a no.of my friends told me before, Hey, i think you shd start planning what u wanna do or study instead on jux playing (dota, shop, all kinds). Some said, dota is useless, I shd stop it. Bcux of dota, (1)i neglected studies, (2)don haf a bf, (3)rage and emo over a game at times, (4)don haf tt much time for friends.
I wanna explain uh. (1) I DON neglect studies bcux of dota, jux that im a last min person and even if i don play, i'll wait till the last min den i'll study. No y. Thats jux me. (2) Pple say that find bf to spend time with, well, since i gt dota, i don see a need to. 0.0 For me, i don realli put love in the first place. Interest> love. If i haf a bf and he doesnt support me in what i do, i don see a need to continue on. I believe that what is meant to be, will be. So no point rushing. (3) ya. true. but nw, i seldom rage and emo over a game as compared to last time uh. Even if i do, it will be for awhile only. (4) I'll still meet my friends up for shopping, singing and stuffs liddat when free, so its still okie. Well, my friends gt their bf to acc too, so i gt my dota?? or others friends. o.o
True. Playing dota cant make money and help in the future or whatever. But the joy from winning a game cannot be bought with money too. I wanna win. I love winning so much that if i happen to, i'll be realli happy. Yet, I hate losing more than i love to win. Contradicting? i think so too. So ya. that explains. But im quite glad that some friends do support me. muahahah.
Okie next, future. Future- work? marriage? To be honest, even until now i dunno what will i be wrking as when i graduate. time passes so quickly that hey, im left with 2 wks of attachment and 4 months more to graduate from poly. I gt no other interest soo even thou hw hard i try to plan/think what i wanna do, i cant =<. But okie la. Maybe i'll just get those few months contract job den keep changing here and der. Marriage? Wtfuk. I cannot imagine myself getting married sia. Sure damn bai chi. Okie la. i admit, i childish. So me settling down? hmmm, weird. But eventually one day, i'll haf to, when i manage to find the Mr Right uh. But for me, when i graduate, firstly, i'll get my driving license. Den, i'll wrk to get a car. Den i'll think of settling down, perhaps, abt, 25? Aiyah, say say only. This kind cannot predict one. Like i said, if Meant to be, eventually will.
Okie, thats all. Preparing to go home. tml hols. WOOT. =D
Just ME ;
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Cough Cough Cough!!!
Damnit. I had a really hard time trying to slp ytd night. i was lyk coughing for almost the whole night and it sux. I had no idea why my cough was so bad. Kept drinking water but still, lyk no use leii.
Fk le. I feel lyk im gng to get sick again. I jux gotten myself 2 days mc some whr ard last month, and this month, I think im gng to be sick again! Damn weak can. Why keep sick. Last time i seldom sick nw keep sick. Sick still okie lei. Can mc. Can rest. Can slp longer. BUT BUT BUT, I haf to eat medicine. Noo. I hate it. Yes i cant swallow it. zzz. Dont ask me why uh. Cux i ownself also dunno y. PLUS. MED IS DAMN BITTER LA. Also, if take too many days of mc, haf to pay back. Like for eg, my attachment ends at 3rd dec but if i were to take too many days of mc, i have to extend it ( meaning my attachment doesnt end at 3rd). <--- Damn lame. Nerd system.
Therefore, I cannot sick =<. W-h-a-t-e-v-e-r.
Just ME ;
